“It must be hard to have your first child have so many allergies. I wonder what it’s like have the normal one be your second child since you don’t really know what normal is, do you…”
She sort of stated with some rising intonation as if asking a question in there…but not quite. Hmm, I thought to myself for a second before responding, “No way! When you have a kid with as many allergies as J-1 does, things like my second kid (J-2) eating yogurt without profusely vomiting in 30 sec. and being covered in hives is somehow surreal to us! We get joy every time J-2 tries a new food and doesn’t react.” I guess this goes to prove her point that, yeah, I mean we really don’t know what normal is, do we?
We are not the family chowing down on pizza on a Friday night. Or the one eating Saturday breakfast consisting of pancakes, eggs, and bacon (although we do certainly enjoy our share of bacon in our family). It’s interesting what we face in life and how that shifts and then re-shapes our perspective. Having a child with allergies has truly transformed my own personal view on food and what we put into our bodies, hardships people face, taking the little things for granted (like going to a restaurant or eating at a friends home), enjoying the simple things (like when our son passed the pistachio challenge and we could add pistachios to our repertoire of household foods). Allergies are rough, don’t get me started on that….because it’s the reason this blog exists.
BUT…having a child with allergies has given me perspective on the hardships other people face on a daily, hourly basis. It has brought me a sweet joy to see my son eat healthy and to learn what foods his body CAN tolerate. It has given me a greater joy and appreciation when my husband and I get to sneak out on a date night, just the two of us and gorge ourselves on what we refer to as “allergens” now:) Which by the way, we often wake up the next day saying, “I don’t feel that great”. That’s another topic though on what “bad” foods do to our bodies and maybe a way to re-think normal ourselves.
Yes, we may not be your typical “family” with “normal” kids, but I have to say, we are learning the true essence of having compassion for others going through any challenge in life. As my children grow, they are going to be forced into an empathetic way of interacting with others who have something about them that makes them “different,” that perhaps makes them “ stand out” from the rest. I can only hope we teach them to be okay with the those differences and to be the kind of friends to others who are kind, who care. Heck, we don’t need to be normal over here in this household, we want to be extra-normal…or rather, extraordinary as we live our lives together:)